Thoughtful Thursday: Overcoming Self-Doubt

My aim today is just to look at something that has affected me and could possibly be of help to others.  Something about the war that goes on in our heads, sometimes our hearts...I'm really not sure if this will be a flop, but here goes!

The most prominent issue in this category for me at this time, well, most of the time, is self doubt.  I go through this war in my mind about many, many things.  This blog, for example.  I was back and forth, like I had the devil on one shoulder and an angel on another...

Art courtesy of digitalart; freedigitalphotos.net

"You don't have anything to say."  
"Then why do I have so much in my head?"
"You already spout off at the mouth too much!"
"I know and accept that fact.  But this could channel my spouting!"

You get the idea.  In spite of this, here I am!  HERE I AM!  I am doing it!  I have leaped across so many hurdles in the self doubt category lately, I thought I'd try to corral my thoughts and give a few tips about what has helped me.

1.  Gather information.  This is tricky.  Gather information in the spirit of collecting data, not in the spirit of making yourself feel prepared enough to jump in.  You will never have that much information before starting, it's not possible.  Some things only come through experience; the older I get, the more I think that applies to most things rather than just some.

2.  Find people succeeding at what you want to do.  Simple.  For example, if your dream is to be the top direct salesperson in your region, look to the top salesperson in your region for inspiration, advice, ideas, and assurance that it is possible.

3.  Let go of haters.  Yes, I actually used the word "haters".  Yes, I'm shocked too.  It is true though, that not everyone will wholeheartedly support you, not everyone will believe you can do it.  If you can't get your head wrapped around letting what they say go in one ear and out the other, don't talk to them about your ideas.  Simple.  If they put doubt seeds in your conversation anyway, walk away.  Hang up the phone.  Let go.  It is about them, not you, so don't take it on.

4.  Get support.  You need supportive people in your life, no matter whether you are inventing new cures for cancer, sewing crafts for hobby shows, battling a chronic or terminal illness, or battling a teenager!  Gather those supporters close to you and hang on their words.  I never would have been able to accomplish this without the support of my dad, Papa B, the support of my darling love, and the support of my dear friend, Neonatal Nurse Nancy.  Many people have supported me and I thank ALL of you, I'm just mentioning here the people who have been, day to day, championing me.

5.  Stop getting in your own way.  You know what I'm talking about.  That running tape in your head that has all those doubtful, negative remarks in it.  Here's how I overcame that part:  I thought about my daughters.  I thought, "Would I ever say these things to my daughters?  How would I feel if my daughters said these things to themselves?"  In this way, I have moved around my own self-sabotaging thoughts.

6.  Jump In.  Take a deep breath and just get going.  What are you waiting for?


Angel/devil art credit